Finally time for MYSELF

It certainly takes getting used to. What I'm referring to is spending Saturdays alone. For years when my kids were younger, I spent it fetching them to classes and back, or giving tuition to supplement the family income, doing chores or helping them with their schoolwork. But now, I realised those days are over. Yes I still had lunch and dinner with them today, but my whole morning and afternoon was spent on my own. At first it felt weird, esp when I went for my inline skating and there were mostly families there. After lunch with my kids, I went to the library and then gym. On my way there, I passed hordes of families with young kids, giving me a sense of nostalgia as I recalled how I used to be like them, bringing my kids to library, classes, lunch and shopping.

But then I told myself - I was also harried and occupied with the needs of my kids then. I never had the luxury of spending time with myself and enjoying a leisurely Saturday doing the things I love to do. So now that my kids are grown up and more independent, I'm now free to explore my own interests.

I borrowed a book, "Lizard" by Banana Yoshimoto, that I couldn't stop reading all the way on the train to the Hougang gym. It's a compilation of short stories that are really mesmerising in an artful and simple way. Recalling the motivating words by a gym goer 2 weeks ago, I went at my workout with a vengeance. Let me tell you what this gym goer said. He's my age but looks in his mid-thirties. He competed in the Nationals when he was in his 20s and was even a trainer at Gold's Gym in the eighties? Anyway we chatted at the gym and what he said revolutionized my attitude towards body building. I told him how reluctant I was to train 'harder' due to a fear of looking too muscular for a woman and some of my female colleagues have even commented on my 'muscles'. I told him I don't want to look unfeminine. When he heard that, he snorted and told me that women who dun weight-train may look slim and shapely still in their 20s and 30s, but when they reach their late 30s or 40s, even if they manage to keep slim, they are not fit and strong, so they get sick easily or may even contract critical illnesses like heart problems, diabete, high blood pressure, etc. "Then they will come looking for you for advice!" Which is true. Quite a few of my colleagues and friends who are in their 30s or older have asked me how I managed to keep so fit and healthy for my age.

Anyway his advice is - not to bother about these people who dun know the benefits of exercise, but to focus on standing out from the 'crowd' by being a fit and healthy model. He said only people who exercise, like him, will appreciate women who have fit and toned bodies. Men and women who dun exercise get intimidated, that's why they criticize but they are the ones who lose out in the end when they fall ill or put on weight. After I heard that, I actually felt proud of my muscles, haha! I know they dun make me any less of a woman, just look at the makeover pics i took. I still look feminine, don't I? But more importantly, I feel fit and healthy! That's better than any compliment!

On the way back, I bought a Baby-G sports watch cos my Nike one is falling apart. Check it out :


Can't wait to use it once my Nike watch falls apart totally. Still can wear it but I figure not for long...

Dinner with my kids at Flaming Grills was fabulous. I ordered my favourite Grilled Dory with Cowboy beans and Grilled Corn cob. We had a great time joking and laughing. I realise that this phase of my life isn't so bad after all. Instead of feeling lonely, I should actually focus on getting to know myself and enriching my life with hobbies that I enjoy. I'm looking forward already to my swimming tmr nite with my sports buddy, and inline-skating on Tuesday, Thursday and Friday with my skating buddies and gym on Wednesday n Saturday !