The Love I've Been Looking For

Body dysmorphic disorder - for those of us who know this term might have an inkling of the mental suffering and torture of this mental condition. For me, it's afflicted me most of my childhood into adulthood, so much so that it was like living in a mental prison. I thought I had succeeded in getting rid of it...but yesterday, WHAM! it came back with a fury. Viewing some photographs of myself for the purpose of changing my NRIC (that's another story), I was suddenly overwhelmed with a strong dislike of my face that just grew into a crippling feeling of helplessness and despair...thinking ...With this ugly face, no wonder I had such a hopeless marriage, no wonder I drifted in and out of relationships and NO WONDER I'm where I am right now, no man's land...I'd always be used and left lonely in the end. Self pity and hopelessness just engulfed me and I had this urge to end my life there and then to put an end to all the misery I felt and to avoid any more future rejection and failure at finding love. Then .. thank God a thought came thru the darkness.."but you're loved by God, the creator of the Universe". Suddenly it all sank in, yes I'm made by Him and loved by Him. Why don't I accept myself?